Ok make sure you have a full cup of what ever you normally enjoy drinking, and have gone to the bathroom, and if you smoke you might want to make sure you have more then just three in the pack.
Grrrr
well I didn't get to sit and watch Heroes. It's not often I want to sit down and watch t.v.
The phone has been ringing more in the past two days then it has in the past 7yrs. LOL
So you can believe me when I say I wasn't nice to the guy that called at 8.25, and I sure wasn't nice to the guy that called at 9.45. Around my house kids are in bed by 9pm normally durning the week. My son had to get up and find out who was calling. So that didn't help me with the guy on the phone. Come Fri and Sat nights, as long as they aren't screaming their heads off and ticking their daddy off, they don't have a set bed time.
Grrr, ok does no one out there respect the unwritten 10pm rule anymore? Thankful it wasn't another sales man, and I will say my father's net buddy, thinks I'm a real snotty witch, now. But it wasn't helping things when hubby has a raised eyebrow at me and mom come up behind me asking who's calling, and I'm trying to understand who this man asking for my father is. Doesn't help that someone called earlier today. Hubby answered and dad actual spoke on the phone. It was some gal trying to give him a credit card. So I figured it was another sales person, and I really didn't want to listen to daddy bellow about having to listen to another sales person. Well not actual hear since he is hard hearing and he can only catch may 1 out of 10 words over the phone. And to you dang phone makers. Your speaker level on these new phones bite big time when a hard hearing person tries to use them. There are times that I even have a hard time hearing a person on the phone. Ok, it might help if the other person on the other end was on a land line instead of trying to sale their pitch to me over a cell phone. The buzz that comes over my phone while they are using their cell phone makes it very difficult to hear what they are saying.
Ok, back to the past 10pm caller. He did apologize for calling so late, and I truthful hope I sounded nicer to him once I figured out he wasn't a salesman calling. It's nice to know people care about my daddy. And believe me when I say it's good to have daddy reconnected to the internet, and off my computer. It's bad enough that I have to share my computer with hubby and son, but my daddy lives on the computer. He spends almost every waking moment on the web. And I can understand why the guy was calling to find out if anything was wrong with daddy. Cause it is not normal for my daddy to miss a day in his favorite chat rooms. He would of been in them on my computer but I did warn him if he get a bug on my computer I would be screaming for days, but I think he wasn't in the chat rooms because no mater how many times I have uninstalled the new java and downloaded the file to reinstall it, it just won't work, and all the chat rooms he go to use java. The java will work on explorer, but it won't work with netscape. So it doesn't bother me, if I really want to play the java based game I bring up explore, but netscape has All my bookmarks, and my hubby's bookmarks. Breath! your getting off subject again bb.
What subject was I on anyway? Oh that after 10pm caller. Calls after 10pm is consider rude in most houses. Ok granted I'm more then likely up and I wouldn't really be complaining about him calling if I didn't have kids. My computer room is off the kitchen, it use to be the pantry, but it become my computer room after we closed down my little store and I had to go somewhere with the 3 computers that had been in the store. Which is next to my kid's bedroom, and it's where the phone is also. The two big powerful computers are in here, and the oldest cranky computer my son inherited for their room. To get everything in the kid's room my son's head is against the wall where my computer room is and the phone hangs on the wall. I have the ringer set on it's highest level so if no one happens to be on my computer then we might get lucky and hear the cricket going off at us.
Here is a thought for you phone maker companies. You offer a choice of ring tones for cell phones why don't you do the same for land line phones?????????LOL ok drove off the road and my mind went completely blank.
Ok had a little snit with hubby and had to tell him it's my computer. His comp is sitting on the other desk in this little room which has not been booted up cause after an electrical storm we had the night before he walked off his job, messed it up more then I know how to fix. That storm also fried the dsl modem we were using. So we had to make a choice of buying a new modem and using my computer or sending his computer to the shop to be fixed. He chose the new modem which we are paying in three installments on our phone bill.
OH! OH! OH! Hubby got an email earlier titled INTERESTED.
LOL problem is the guy didn't say what item he is interested in. I've been busy with my laser beamed mind toward a goal, and that is to get people to hubby's web page and try to sell his leather work. But the problem is, that's not the only thing I've been busy putting out on the web trying to sell. I spent a whole day doing nothing but searching for free classified places that I could place ads for things hubby is wanting to sell.
I'm rather feed up with e-bay, and I refuse to put anything on sale there, if hubby wants to more power to him, but he isn't going to get my help with e-bay. LOL which all hubby knows how to do on e-bay is buy.
Beside last time me and hubby sat down to put something on e-bay together we ended up fighting. LOL, he sold the item at a nice happy price and he strutted around the house for a week bragging about the price a bidder bought it at. LOL, I warned him about accepting the guy's bid. He had a lot of recent negative feed back from other sellers about him not paying for what he high bided for. If you hadn't guess the guy didn't send the money, he didn't get the item either. But with e-bay raising their fees a lot over a year's time and all the changes they had made just didn't sit well with me. My thinking if they want to cater to the few well know name brand companies fine, but if enough of the small money people that use e-bay stop using e-bay they will take notice really quickly because they look at the bottom $ line.
It's like Wal-Mart and all the big stink people are making over their not paying their employees right. Oh, Wal-Mart is doing a lot of PR trying to band aid their bad image, but in truth enough people stopped shopping at Wal-Mart for those desk paper pushing guys to take notice and start worrying about their jobs. That is the only reason they are doing what they are doing. The bottom $ line dropped and woke them up.
If they are really doing what the PR rep. is saying. I don't have a clue, but in truth I don't see why they would. The way they were running their stores, no one worked 40hrs, most workers were lucky if they got 39hrs a week. Which meant every single employee that worked for Wal-Mart wasn't full time help, and Wal-Mart didn't have to give employee benefits to the part-timers which was almost everyone working for Wal-Mart. Employee benefits is expensive for any company to offer to their employees. And the big millions of $ Wal-Mart was making and saving is now exposes to the world. But in truth I have to laugh.
Cause Wal-Mart is NOT the only company that operates that way. Wal-Mart is just the only company that got their pants pulled down and exposed to the world.
Most all multi million dollar company cuts expenses every way they can. If there is a multi million dollar company out there that isn't on top of their expenses they won't stay a multi million dollar company for long. The laws for a business owner is many, and those laws tend to force those paper pushing guys at the top to search for ways to save money for the company. But those guys sitting behind the desks pushing the paper are just workers as well, and the true multi million dollar men have died and it's their family or board of directors that are now running the companies, and I don't think a single one of them have read the book.
The Richest Man in Babylon, or those companies wouldn’t be looking for all the $ cutting ways that they are doing. Ok maybe the man, oh my brain has took a dump to his name. Microsoft. I feel sure in saying that he has read the Richest Man in Babylon, sometime in his life. But I can also say confidently that he has stepped back from Microsoft and passed the power of running the company to others. The problem with that is the ones he put in charge have not read the Richest Man In Babylon.
Ok, the Richest Man in Babylon is a book. You can more then likely google it or look on amazon to find it.
And there is more then likely a few places that you find an outline of the book. But to gain all the knowledge from the book you have to read it. And I will admitting tell you I’m searching for my copy of the book, to reread it again. Specially since my hubby told me I get to make the bread for the family for a while.
LOL he didn’t like the fact I smiled and jumped up and pulled the bread maker out and made him a loaf of homemade bread. 3hrs later I pull the hot bread pan out of the bread maker and with a hot pad carried it to him and told him I made the bread. You just had to be there to see his face, to get a real laugh from it.
He told me not so politely that I knew that wasn’t what he meant when he said it. And he didn’t like my joke, but my smiling and waving that fresh yeast bread under his nose and my giving him a wink calmed him down some, but it still doesn’t help that there is still six of us living off daddy’s little v.a. pension, and there are bills to pay.
The only sure bets in life is the bills are never late coming in the mail, taxes, and death. If you don’t believe me about the bills, mark down on your calendar the day they come in and see if next month that don’t arrive on the SAME DAY of the month. That also goes for government monthly checks. My Paw Paw’s checks that he gets all come in by the 3rd day of the month. Daddy’s check is electronic deposit so believe it or not there are times that it’s in the bank the day before the 1st, but the 1st was a Sunday this month so it didn’t get to the bank until the 2nd which was Monday.
Where is the frying pan? Oh yes, I got tired of typing along on bravenet and get to the bottom to find sometime or another I got logged out and the post button is gone. So I’m typing along in word, and I’ll copy and paste it to bravenet. The only thing I really miss is my frying pan smiley. LOL. Hit me over the head with it, cause my mind went off in another direction and I forgot what I was writing about.
Yes it’s a long one, word says I’m working on page 3 now. Am I manic? Ok in truth haven’t a clue the pain is still back there and I’m really working hard making faces at the screen, the clock says it’s almost 2am 1:42am to be specific. If you don’t have a clue why I’m making faces then I suggest you read a past entry I made called Pic of bb and panic attacks. LOL, Jamie you need a yawn? The only problem is that not matter how many faces I make it’s not going to stop me from going manic if I haven’t already gone into manic mode, but If I am in manic mode it really doesn’t feel like a normal manic mode for me. I still feel like I’m tense up to go in manic mode, and I haven’t chewed my nails to the bleeding quick’s yet.
Another good thing about word it’s lets me know when I have misspelled a word, but it doesn’t tell me when I have missed typing a word in, and it doesn’t tell me when I have spelled the word but used the wrong word but the word that sounds like the same word I was trying to put there. Thank you Hubby, sticking my tongue at you. Yes, surprise, surprise hubby comes and looks in my head once in awhile.
Poor hubby, we may be married 12 or 13yrs now, but there are times he just doesn’t know what is going on in my head, and then there are the times he doesn’t want to know what is going on in my head. There are times that I think he is ashamed of me, and my illness. I really can’t blame him there are times that I’m ashamed I’m not all there upstairs, but it’s only after I’ve crash from manic mode that I become ashamed of many of my actions. And most of the time it’s hubby that is the one that saved my manic behind from the dangerous and sometimes out right stupid things that if I hadn’t been manic I would of not even attempted, or cross my mind.
Why is it when a person is in manic mode they lose their fear? Where in the world in the brain is the part that gives the tingle of fear at? Ok maybe you other guys don’t lose your fear, but I do and that is the worse part for me, of my going in manic mode.
It’s been a long time since I’ve had so much responsibility put on my shoulders, and that pain in my back is trying it’s best to tell me to crumble. To scream at the top of my lungs NO! and run for cover.
My hubby has been with me thick and thin. He has passed me the ball, and in truth I’m surprised as all get out that he is pushing me out in front, and telling me to go getim. LOL. That in it’s self has stunned me, ok it took a few days for me to get use to the idea of me even consider accepting the idea of me being in the lead for a change. Thinkingcraft hit me on the head in so many ways that I never realized until I actual took the time to think about what all they were trying to tell me. And the reason I’m not giving the link isn’t cause I don’t think you should go there, it’s just that I went back to the link and read the fine print at the bottom. It cost $25.00 for the test I took. One of the many things I’ve signed up to receive offers to my email box sent it to me and I didn’t have to pay a penny to Thinkingcraft. Yes I got to take the test free, but I think the little test I took also wasn’t the whole test. Can’t remember positively, what all it entailed, been filling out lots of forms and receiving lots of email. As much as it might of gave me an insight to myself, I know many of you that read my entries don’t have the extra 25$ they will want you to pay.
Once again drove off the road. I was talking about me being stunned that my hubby is literally putting me in the drivers seat and telling me DRIVE! You might need a little insight into my hubby, he isn’t the type to let a female lead. He is the beat his chest type. Me man you woman type. LOL. I love him. And in many ways I feel like he is testing me to see if I’m going to let him down by caving in, or for you sports fans. DROP THE BALL!
Is what he’s asking really that difficult?
Oh boy, in many ways it’s a big YES! and then it’s a little no.
Can I do it?
NO! No! no! ok well maybe I can.
I feel a lot like that Little train that could.
I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.
OHHHH, that pain in my back.
No one is going to hire me! 13yrs of nothing on my resume isn’t going to cut it! The pee test is out cause if I don’t tell them about my depression and they require a peeing test which my taking my one little pill the test is going to come back failed.
So WHAT TO DO???
Where is my ******* copy of Richest Man of Babylon. Here bookie, bookie, bookie.
I can’t remember anything past the 1st rule. I need you bookie!
If I’m going to do this I’m going to have to read you again.
I don’t want to drop the ball, I really want to be there for my hubby and kids, but if I’m going to do it. I’m going to have to do it my way all the way and with you in my hand bookie. I can’t do this without the knowledge you have written inside of you bookie.
Ok, well it’s now 2.53am and I really want to get up and start tearing the house apart to find the book, but then I’ll wake mom and the kids up, not to mention hubby.
OH! Hubby is asleep in our BED! does a little wiggle in her chair.
The only problem with that is the moment I crawl in bed he will wake up, and crawl over me to get out of bed. All of everything I know is getting to him just as much as it’s gotten to me. AND HE IS SUPPOSE TO BE THE NORMAL ONE. Yah, Yah, norms that live with a Bipolar don’t have the easiest of partners, and norms get down sometimes too. They are just lucky that most the time all they need is a good night’s sleep and they are back to their normal self the next day.
I think what is bothering him the most is that he knows I can make money, if I just apply myself. I have shown him many times over the 13yrs that I can. But I have never really been able to get it threw his thick skull that in order to make money one has to have some starting money.
Oh, if I had some type of credit, I would have investors already, and my start up money wouldn’t be a worry any more for me. LOL, but it boils down to my hate using credit cards. It’s not cause I have bed credit. It’s my lack of even being on the credit radar, that lost me the chance to have interested investors in me and my business idea.
Yes, I’ve got three of them that are running in my head, and needless to say two of them are still in the scribbling phrase of my mind because I need to read and study some before they will work. One of them require me either to find a Java programming brain or learn Java myself. Paying some Java Brain to make what I want won’t work cause I just don’t have the money to pay him when baby girl drinks a gallon of milk every other day. So you can say MONEY is stopping me from taking it and running until I drop with my two big ideas.
It’s possible that is a GOOD thing at the moment, for me. So what I do is put my bull dog teeth into getting my hubby’s web site known.
LOL, I still can’t get over hubby yelling at me, wanting me to come here into the computer room last night while I was attempting to watch Heros.
Needless to say the “I’m Interested” email made me scratch my head, and hubby asked me a few questions and all I could do was shrug my shoulders at him cause I honestly couldn’t answer him. When I told him I had been busy placing ads on all the free classified ads sites I could find his mouth dropped open.
Yes, I should of been keeping better track of what and where I was putting ads at, and unfortunately I didn’t think about getting better organized until after he started yelling at me while heros was on in the other room. Thankfully the phone rang and saved me from having to listen to him yell a whole lot.
Baby girl has very good hearing cause I sure can’t hear the phone ring when I’m in the front room, and the t.v. is on, but she saved me from hubby starting back up yelling at me after I hung the phone up.
Well there is no reply in hubby’s email account yet back from him and it’s 3:34am and I have made faces long enough at the computer that I’m relaxing tired and might be able to lay down and sleep at least hopefully 4hrs and word is telling me I’m working on my 5th page.
558
So I’ll say.
Thanks for stopping by and reading my very long ramblings.
Thanks for leaving your mark.
Hope you have a good day, evening or night which ever may be your case.
bb
2 Comment(s).
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Hey,
dang BlackBird! that was one heck of a marathon post... your mind sounds very sharp. it must be good to be able talk things out like that. the story about your son thinking i was Earl was cute. i wish i had it as together as Earl does. 
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